A Life Lesson from The Game of Thrones

Game of Thrones is back for its final season this week. This video comes from the beautiful city walls of Ávila, about 100kms to the west of Madrid in Spain.

I used to think that it was enough to be good at your job, and to be nice to people… and money, success and power would come. How wrong I was. The Game of Thrones makes it clear: if you have something of value, someone stronger will take it from you. You must be strong or be protected.

Are you Strong or are you Protected?

The key to transforming yourself

I came across this TEDx talk by Robert Green – the author of “The 48 Laws of Power“. He shares his life experience. He was lost, without any clear career direction for many years. At 36 years old, his parents despaired of him.

In a single conversation with the right person, all of that past experience became the necessary preparation for the book that made him famous.

“The way to transform yourself is through your work” Robert Green

He answers the question: “how do I let this process work in my own life?” How do you allow your intuition and life experience to guide you gently towards what you are here to be and do?

His answer is that it is our work that has the greatest capacity to change ourselves from the inside out. You cannot find yourself on the weekend or in vacations or through drugs or journeys. You find yourself through your work.

The #1 Most Important Tool in Negotiation

There is a power tool in negotiation. I would say this is the single most useful tactic that I use in my years of selling (I sell private jets among other high value products).

It is not competitive, it is not aggressive, it is not avoiding anything.

It does not require massive intellectual development, years of training or genetic gifts.

It requires no study, no poetic ability nor any magical secret ingredients.

It is …

Silence.

Me: “What is your best price?”

Supplier: “Blah, blah [Product feature #2], blah… I can offer you €100”

Me: “Hmmm.” and wait… 10… 20 seconds… (tension increasing)

Supplier: “Ok, I can give you €90… but that is our best price”

Me: “Hmmm.” and wait… 10… 20 seconds… (tension increasing)

… and on…

How can I learn to be more Influential?

Daniel Shi gives a simple but profound answer to “How can I learn to be more Influential?” over on Quora:

I think that you can certainly become influential without having to do something “extraordinary.”

7 Steps to become more Influential

Connect with many people. Learn that just because someone may not be important today, it doesn’t mean that he or she won’t be in the future. And even better if it is with your help.
Remember people’s names and what you talked about. Have a repository in memory of what you talked about. Everybody you know has some request for help that you may be able to help them with. Have it cycling in your head as you go about meeting more people and encountering new things. When something clicks, act upon it. And that brings me to:
Follow up. Find reasons to talk to people. Do this out of genuine desire to build relationships and to help people. Learn to tell the difference between being genuine and when you are being too forward.
Develop a love of helping other people. See the success of other people as being your success, rather than a lost opportunity for you. If you help someone else out, they will remember you down the road.
Don’t think of interactions with people as a one shot deal. You will no doubt meet that person again some day. You will have another interaction with them as well.
Learn to communicate well. None of the above is really applicable if you find it difficult to craft a message.
Be likeable, but not to everybody.

And of course, this is the most important lesson that I ever learned from my college accounting professor:

Your name is your most valuable asset.

Original Text: Quote of Daniel Shi’s answer to How can I become influential?

Tag: power