This week I have been teaching at the Mid Atlantic Business School on the island of Santa Cruz de la Palma. This video shares a lesson that many participants took from the day: “Listen with Your Eyes“.
Hearing is a sense that differs from all our other senses, because it has a buffer. I am able to re-listen to the last 8 seconds of what I have recently heard. This allows me to pay little attention to what is being said, until I hear my name or a silence that indicates that someone is waiting for me to respond. We need to practice listening to a deeper level – what I call “listening with your eyes”.
How can you influence people who are close to you without impacting the quality of your relationship?
What do you do to influence a behaviour of your child?
How do you speak to a friend with an addiction that is affecting their life?
How can you help a family member with a poor habit that is affecting their quality of life?
How to Influence People who are Close to you (without damaging the relationship)
Michael Pendelton of Yale University has spent many years looking at how families can intervene in the life of a loved one with an addiction problem and achieve lasting positive change. He has shown that long term, forcing change will not work.
There are 3 ingredients that are necessary to achieve lasting change in a person who is challenged with an addiction.
Let me know in the comments below what you think of Michael’s influencing strategy? Is it realistic? Can you see it working in your relationships?
There is formula for changing people. Doctor Malik Mohammed shared this wisdom with the EO Global Leadership Academy last week in Washington, USA. If you are to change someone’s behaviour patterns, two things are necessary.
As the director of a 75-year-old study on adult development, Waldinger has unprecedented access to data on true happiness and satisfaction. In this talk, he shares three important lessons learned from the study as well as some practical, old-as-the-hills wisdom on how to build a fulfilling, long life.
Why is it hard?
We often look for quick fixes. There are no relationship quick fixes. Relationships take lifelong, constant effort. You must actively work to keep the important relationships in your life strong.
What does leaning in to relationships look like? Do something new together. Reach out to the family regularly. Listen and share. Reach out without reason to friends. Pick up the phone and meet.